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Memory And Worry


The woman whose memory allows her to play tour games like chess blindfolded is good for nothing else. Book-keepers who can name every folio page and every customer's balance are good for little else. There is nothing in mental gymnastics from the dollar standpoint.

The good lawyer or the good business woman does not rely on her memory, but rather her ability to find out things and get at results. If you remember only the customers who are slow to pay or shaky, it will be a lot easier than to remember the names of all the customers who pay promptly.

If your husband wants you to get something down town tomorrow, write his request on a little piece of paper, roll it up in a ball, put it in your pocket with your loose change. Forget the incident, let the paper do the memory act.

Next day when you reach in your pocket for change you will find the little ball with the reminder on it. If there is something you want to attend to at home, drop yourself a postal card.

Carry a little pad of paper in your pocket. Write down the little things you are to do. Don't store your mind with these temporary matters. Let the tab remember for you. Let your mind be like a sieve, and have the meshes coarse enough to keep in the big things and let the little things go through.

Have your business figures written down, your comparative sales, increases or losses. Study the written figures. Have a system. Do things methodically. Don't trust to your memory. It the thing you see or hear is worth keeping, write it down on the little tab.

The orator who commits her speech to memory is in a sorry plight if she forgets a sentence. If you are to speak at a dinner, lay out your plan, divide your topic into several parts. Jot down the catch lines, and just before you speak look over the ticket. Charge your brain with the points or ideas and build the words around them. Don't remember things with verbatim correctness.

When you quote a price or figure, jot it down. Confirm the verbal statement by a written memorandum. Memory is a bad servant sometimes. You remember a thing one way and the other fellow remembers it another way. You are both honest, but one of you is wrong. If you had made a memorandum in duplicate or jotted down the figures, what trouble it would have saved you.

Where dollars are concerned it is good sense to trust to a written memo, and not to any mental memo. No use to cram your brain with transient things, when lead pencils and paper are so cheap and so easily obtainable.

The employe who trusts to her memory hurts the business, and after she quits a lot of misunderstandings will come up. Insist on your employes making memorandums of things and prices, for when the employe goes she takes her memory with her. If she has a memorandum you know the facts.

As to worry, nothing will prevent effective work like it. If you are given to introspection and worry, and allow these things to go unchecked, they become habits with you, and while your sleep, in a measure, is an antidote for worry, yet the more worry you have the less soundly you will sleep, and consequently the less effective sleep will be in correcting the injury caused by worry.

Sunshine and darkness cannot be present at the same time, for in nature one of the first rules we find is that no two objects can occupy the same place at the same time. No matter how much one is given to the worry habit, she experiences reflex moments when she does not worry. Some of our pessimistic friends who are given to the worry habit say it is impossible for them not to worry. You are thinking of what you are reading, and if your mind is interested in it you are not worrying while you are reading these articles, and this shows that if you are interested in reading there is little chance for worry to get in; for your mind is occupied.

Women have tried all sorts of things to escape worry. Some of them frequent places where gaiety and mirth abound, so that they are for the time being banishing worry, but in proportion as these things keep one from worrying, the reaction is stronger when it does come, and the individual who tries to escape worry by going the pace and occupying her time with light things, suffers more keenly from worry when it does come. Some women turn to drink to kill worry. Many a woman imagines while she is drunk and her brain is clogged with alcohol that she is the happiest woman in the world, and some of them go to the extent of imagining their finances are in a flourishing condition. The alcohol fills the brain with fancy pictures, and for the time being the mind forgets to worry. When the alcohol wears away the brain takes up the worry again in an increased degree.

To kill worry by the active process is like trying to cure rheumatism by external application. The only thing you do is to stop the pain temporarily. The best way to cure rheumatism is to go at it through the blood. Eradicate the uric acid from the system, and then the rheumatism will disappear. The best way to cure worry is not by local applications, but by getting at the root of things. Eliminate as far as possible the things which cause worry. Remember that as long as you live there will come things across your path that are not to your liking. You should be philosophical, and make the best of things that are about you.

Look at the bright side rather than the dark. There are only two things in the world to worry about. First, the things we can control or change; second, the things over which we have no control. Now, it is manifestly useless to worry over the first kind; for we can correct the thing and there will be nothing to worry about.

It is manifestly useless to worry over the things we cannot control, for, as set down in the second proposition, we cannot change the things. It therefore behooves us to eliminate from our calculations the second kind of worry, for no amount of worry can possibly change that kind. We must therefore confine our attention to the first kind, the kind we can change, and when we have changed the thing there is no cause to worry.

Nothing helps a woman’s health so much as contrasts in climate or habits. When the doctor tells you it is necessary to go to California or Arizona, or some other distant point, she knows that fifty per cent of the good you will get by the change is from the water, air, sunshine and surroundings, and the other fifty per cent of the good you will get is because you have been taken away from the very things that have been causing you worry. If you can’t get contrasts by trips to other distant points, you can get the contrasts right where you live. If your mind is occupied in the day with deep thinking and hard business problems, you should occupy your evening with something that will contrast with it. Take up some light literature, play with your children, or work at some hobby in which you are interested.

The trouble with those who worry most is that they have worked themselves up to such a frenzied state they can’t read anything excepting startling newspaper articles and freakish, frothy books.

The woman with rheumatism cannot cure herself in a day, neither can the woman with the worry habit eradicate worry from her make-up in a day or so.

The woman who worries should make up her mind he is going too read and get interested in the reading. Let her set apart ten minutes the first day, and agree that she will devote those ten minutes honestly, intently to the subject before her. The next day she can add a minute or two, and so on until she can read one or two hours at a time. Finally, the wrinkles will be ironed out and the horizon will be brightened.

As we are, so is the world to us. The most familiar objects change their aspect with every change of the soul. When you worry, everything is distorted, everything appears unnatural, the world looks dark, our friends seem far off. The jokes we hear fall flat. We indulge ourselves in pessimism.

When the whole matter is summed up philosophically, there is no bad luck in the world except sickness. All other so-called hard luck is simply temporary. If you lose your money, don't worry about it, make some more. If you lose a friend, don't worry; show him his mistake. If you lose an opportunity, do not worry; be ready for the next one.

Life is short. The end of life is death. What’s the use of worrying. Worry is like drink. The more you give it the more it fastens on you. Cultivate a cheerful disposition. Mix with people who are cheerful. Do not allow the garden of your mind to grow up with worry weeds. Occupation kills worry. If your mind is filled with uplifting work or brain training it will have little time to worry.

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Col. Wm. C. Hunter, Dollars and Sense, 1906, Gender Adjusted: Feminine

Poise, Efficiency, Peace

Thought-habit, will become fixed on Faith or Fear, and the result is good or bad, accordingly.

If your thought is fixed on Faith, in the greater meaning, you are invincible. If it is fixed on Fear, or its elder child, Worry, you stand helpless, weak, conquered and miserable.

If I can, by suggestion, logic, example, proof, reason or humor get your thought habit fixed on Faith, coach you to the understanding that will give you Poise, Efficiency, Peace, then I have done a thing well worth while.

To that end, and with that purpose, I dedicate my services and this book to each of you who read it.

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